.:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:.
. * .
. /.\ .
. /..'\ Money's short, .
. /'.'\ Times are hard. .
. /.''.'\ Here's your fucking .
. /.'.'.\ Christmas card. .
. /'.''.'.\ .
. ^^^[_]^^^ .
. .
. .
.jgs . .:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:.
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. T'was the night before Christmas .
. And all through the house, . . .
. Everybody felt shitty _\/ \/_ .
. Even the mouse. _\/\/_ .
. _\_\_\/\/_/_/_ .
. Mum at the whorehouse / /_/\/\_\ \ .
. And Dad smoking Grass, _/\/\_ .
. I'd just settled down /\ /\ .
. For a nice piece of ass. ' ' .
. .
. When out on the lawn .
. I heard such a clatter, .
. I sprung from my peice .
. To see what was the matter. .
. .
. Then out on the lawn .
. I saw a big dick, .
. I know in a moment .
. It must be Saint Nick. .
. .
. He came down the chimney .
. Like a bat out of hell, .
. I knew in a moment .
. The fucker had fell. .
. .
. He filled all our stockings .
. With pretzels and beer, .
. And a big rubber dick .
. For my brother, The Queer. .
. .
. He rose up the chimney .
. With a thunderous fart, .
. The son of a bitch .
. Blew the chimney apart. .
. .
. He swore and he cursed .
. As he rode out of sight, .
. Piss on you all .
. And have a hell of a night. .
. .
. jgs. .:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:.
Merry Christmas Everyone! I received a card like this from an old friend many years ago and not a year goes by that I don't think about this poem.
-=U13=-
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