Tim,

I'll be 58 in March...you're only a puppy. <G>

Yeah, yeah, that's what they say.. My health is better than it was, so I bett K>shut up while I'm ahead.

I'm too old to cut the mustard, but can still stir the mayonnaise, and
lick the jar. So, pass the BLT, onion ring, and Dr. Pepper, and no one
gets hurt. <G>

Several years ago, I was asked to do a deal for a fellow square
dancer, who wanted to do this for his girl friend who was turning 50 (I
thought she looked darn pretty for 50!!). He took the old spiritual hymn
"Rock Of Ages, Cleft For Me. Let me hide myself in Thee". The NEW song
was "Rock The Aged, Cry Despair. Lead me to my Rocking Chair!!". <G>

Not only did I do it, but I wrote another verse, dressed up like a
barbershop quartet singer, and did it a cappella (without musical accompaniment), and went up a half step, key wise, with each verse. If
you want, I'll post a message with all 4 verses. That's how I'd like to
be serenaded on my birthday. :)

I did the same thing at a square dance weekend, when the callers wife
turned 50. They had someone dress up as "The Grim Reaper", and brought
in black balloons...with the "cut the mustard deal" noted above. <G>
They also gave her "an over the hill bra"...for those that have fallen
and can't get up!! <LOL!>.

When I was at another square dance weekend in Dallas, Texas, years
ago, the woman who was chairperson of the festival, was celebrating her birthday. One of the square dancers, worked at an area Olive Garden
Restaurant. The woman had a BEAUTIFUL mezzo-soprano voice, and the tone
just "floated". When she got done singing, the birthday lady had tears streaming down her face...and everyone else was applauding. I'd prefer
that song than these "hokey" ones that they do...it's so embarrassing.

I think you need a good vacation, or maybe even to locate to a nice temperate K>beach somewhere.. We most of the time get the same storm tracks you do so I K>understand the t-storms, It's almost like there is one every other day.. I K>guess we're in that perfect spot where the northern front meets the tropical K>systems. It has almost become a mini tornado ally down here in the last 10 K>years we've had a few devistating ones all around us, (knock on wood) seems K>crazy but I kinda feel the two "mountains" our valley sits between spares us, K>because all the bad ones hit just on the north or south side of these K>mountains.

Well, I'd love a vacation (especially a long Amtrak train trip), but I
quit doing extended travel outside of central Arkansas for several reasons...even though I've been fully disabled since 2004, and can't
work a regular job anymore:

1) Declining Health. I have over 50 medical conditions, and I never know
when another kidney stone, IBS, or migraine headache attack will hit. I
want to be close to an area hospital or Emergency Room, if I get ill.

2) I'm part time care giver for my Mom, who turns 91 next month. I do
all the driving, shopping, etc. for her...and am also her computer guru.

3) The apartment complex where I live (H.U.D. subsidized housing for the disabled) does REGULAR inspections of the property and apartments. While
I have an alarm system and renters insurance, I don't want any of my ham
radio or computer stuff "walking off".

4) I don't even get $1100 a month in disability, and can't afford to go
out of town.

5) Riding in, or driving a car, even to an in-state hamfest, is too hard
on me...as my legs will stiffen up or spasm. I use a cane every day, and
have a walker on standby. I'm afraid that eventually, I'll be in a
wheelchair.

We do get straight line winds though.. and sometimes I believe they can be K>worse.

A lot of people mistake straight line winds for tornadoes...but there
is a certain damage path/structure done by each, where you can tell the difference.

(Continued to next message)
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